Dozen of articles. Improve your lifestyle now!

50 Shades of Grey and Abusive Men

I am seeing a strange likeness in 3 things, the fascination with 50 Shades of Grey, the church helping abusive men keep their wives trapped, and sharia law trying to sneak in our country. What is the likeness? The utter degrading, despising, and not covering and protecting woman. Woman that God created to be precious daughters of His, to be treasured and loved. The interesting thing is from the 3 above, the first is considered “sexy”, the second is considered “Christianity”, and the third I believe most in our country would deem a twisted law and despicable. The church needs to get unconfused about what is abuse and what is not, and how God hates violence as much as He does divorce (Malachi), and what is adultery and what is not. (pornography and flirting are both adultery, ask Jesus in Matt, 5:28) I have said many times that the Church carries a great authority on this earth, If you open up “our” (church) closet and find abused, sexually used and psychologically destroyed women in there with their abusive husbands that “we” have put our stamp of “god” on, then we lose a level of authority on this earth to drive out the darkness being pitched to our daughters in things like Shades of Grey. Remember Satan is an opportunist, he will always find an open door to keep the church powerless and him pressing his agenda. Ask yourself and your leaders have we opened that door for him, or have we stood with the daughters of God, as God Himself would and allowed abusive men to receive their consequences, and be buffeted by the enemy (1 Corin. 5:5, or 2 Timothy 2:25), so that they too may be delivered!  Many men would repent and turn around if someone would allow them to have a wakeup call and face the abuse they learned from the enemy and their wounds of the past.  We need to stop getting in the way of the Holy Spirits’s work in their life, and start allowing them to face the truth with their consequences.  A repentant heart is seen in a man who understands why he no longer has a home to live in, until he gets the help he needs.  A repentant heart puts the pain of the family before his own inconveniences of having to attend counseling weekly and pay for it.   A repentant heart will stop at nothing to bring healing to those he has wounded, once he realizes how badly he has wounded them.

This is a tremendous read from another Christian Counselor.…/enough-enough-church-stop-enablin…/


by Lisa Winchell

The Strengths Hidden Behind Your Weaknesses


We believe temperament is inborn, and God given.  According to Psalm 139, God formed your inmost being.  He knit you together in your mother’s womb.  He put the strengths, and traits in you that would lead you to what He has planned for you. You were not created to be someone else.  You were created to be YOU.  You have been created in His Image. You are able to bear His image to the world around you, through your individual traits.  If you try to be someone else, the world around you is going to miss out, and you are going to miss out on enjoying the person you are.


You might say, “Hey, what about those weaknesses, and failures I regularly have?”  Weaknesses are not fun. But our goal at In His Image Counseling, is to help you to see your weaknesses as the strengths God meant them to be.  When I review your temperament profile with you, we cover strengths and weaknesses that are in your unique God given temperament.  But according to the Word, every good gift came from above.  God does not give us weaknesses. So where did they come from?  Consider this, Adam and Eve were created with their own unique temperament as well.  Let’s say, maybe Adam was a melancholy and maybe Eve was a sanguine. Adam would have been very analytical, sitting under a tree for hours thinking about what to name each animal and plant. But when Eve came in from hanging out with all the cool animals, and hugging on them, and wanted to spend time with Adam he would have been happy to put everything down and forget about his task to enjoy his wife.  When it was time to go to sleep he rested easy.  Eve would have enjoyed, the animals, and engaged them and her husband in lots of fun conversations and exciting thrill seeking activities in the garden.


Before they allowed sin in their hearts, there was no fear in their hearts, therefore there was no impatience, fear of failure, offensiveness, or self-centeredness. When sin entered, fear, shame and guilt were the first negative feelings they felt.  These weaknesses would then cause Adam to start tossing and turning, because of concern that someone may not understand why he named that animal what he did, 100 years later.  Eve would have become, “it is all about me”.  “Adam, you never listen to me, I need you to pay attention to me, all the time”. :). This would be coming from her insecurities based in fear.   These may be a little exaggerated. But the point is that sin, causing fear, shame and guilt is what causes the traits God gave you to be weaknesses in your life.


So what we do at, In His image Counseling, is help you discover what strength each of those weaknesses were meant to be.  Such as, a melancholy deals with perfection issues. So what strength could be hidden in that trait?  God gave the melancholy the passion to be excellent, in all that they do.  They love to do their best as unto Lord. That passion is led by love and faith. Perfectionism is driven by fear.  All we have to do is work on letting go of the fear, and excellence will replace perfectionism.


Sanguines can have a tendency to walk away from people when they are speaking, because the sanguine is no longer interested and prefers another conversation.  Could there be strength in that?  Sure, God made a Sanguine to be able to shift from one thing to another to keep things moving and interesting.  When they are operating in self-centeredness/sin/fear they follow the flesh and use that to meet their own needs only. When they are operating in the Spirit, and love, they are honoring to people and listen well, and move on to the next person or thing with grace which draws the whole room into enjoying the sunshine the sanguine has brought into the room.




By Lisa Winchell

You and me, conceived by God!   What an awesome revelation!   I received this revelation one day while in a counseling session.  My client brought up the issue of how much a baby in the womb is affected by the rejection of a parent, especially when considering abortion or adoption (I understand that adoption is not usually an act of rejection, but one of deep love).  We did not have much time to discuss the subject, but as I was praying for her at the end of the session the Lord just started praying through me.

“Thank you God for the deeper understanding we have in this age of all that goes on in the womb.    But, many are going back to the womb to find out where they first began to experience rejection,   They often get their identity from that place.   But, Lord if we are going to go back to the womb to find our identity we must go back even farther.  We must go back to where we were really conceived, by You”.

My client, you, and me were conceived by God.  We came from His will, His heart, and His perfect plan.  When He dreamed you up, He sent you to earth from His heart with a perfect plan for your life, with all the acceptance and love, and goodwill towards you that you would ever need.   There was no rejection in your beginning.

When born, we all entered a world of sin, were born with a sin nature, and were entrusted into the hands of human beings with a sin nature.  These are the places where the pattern of rejection, fear, etc. began.   We all must encounter this world of sin, until Jesus’ enemies are made His footstool.  Even more the reason we need to understand that God still loves you as much as He did when He dreamed you up.  He still has that great destiny for you to fulfill.   He has been reaching out to you all along, to draw you out of the pain this world has brought your way.

You must answer His love.  You must be willing to quit identifying with the pain of the past.  Quit blaming God and your parents.   Get free, through God’s glorious plan of forgiveness and restoration.  He put those in place for you and I, before sin even entered the world,  because He knew the choices man would make.  It is not easy to quit nursing the pains of the past, because they become our “friends”.   Many do not know any other way of living.

Oh, but if you can grasp what your real beginning is, and start anew with that revelation, I believe you can get free from the past.  Knowing that the sin and rejection that the enemy sent your way were all efforts to steal the great love and acceptance your Father placed in you at conception (his first thought of you).  Satan knows that you have been called to greatness, and he knows that being full of love will get you there.  That is why he works so hard to deceive us, through the deception of sin, fear and rejection.

Enter your rest in the perfect love of God.   He not only conceived you in that love, He has sent His Son Jesus to confirm it, and deliver you out of the enemy’s lies.  Read the Word, you can’t miss His love spread all over the place.   Get the revelation and do not let go of it!  It is the real truth!

Remember, before any man or woman spoke a word over you, God the Almighty, the Creator of the Universe, the loving Heavenly Father thought you up and perfected you in His heart and placed greatness in you!

To contact us:  813-684-7927

Suggested Reading:  A New Kind of Love  by  EW Kenyon

Bondage Broken  by Craig Hill

Walking in Love and Enjoying the Benefits

There is a three step process for a happier, more loving, and fulfilled life with your family, friends, and church. The first step is getting rid of the offense/strife. The second step is finding a common cause to move forward in together.   Where there is purpose and unity we can accomplish anything together. The third step is honor, seeing and calling out the good in others.


Let’s start with overcoming offense and strife.   That is only possible if you CHOOSE to live free from these things. We need to make an all out war on offense and strife in our homes, and churches.  War meaning, the battle you must commit to, inside yourself.  We can not make others be non offensive.  But we can release them to the Lord, and surrender our own hearts to Him.  Choose today, to say no to offense and strife.  Choose to be quick to forgive, and unoffendable.  Titus 2:12 says God’s Word teaches us to say no to ungodliness.  Therefore we know where to get truth that will drive out the lies that lead us into offense and strife.  You may say,” how is it lies.  That person really did act mean?”.   Yes, I am sure they did, and many more to come may as well.  But their meanness has no control over you, that you don’t give them.  Jesus Himself determined to walk in love, yet many around him were offensive towards Him.  Jesus is our model, and He also lives in us through His Spirit to empower us to walk the way He did.   Your offense, is a defense mechanism, to protect your sense of value and identity. When you go to the Word, and develop an intimate relationship with the loving God revealed in the Word, you will begin to receive your value and identity from Him, not from others.  When you meditate on scriptures telling you who you are to God, and who you are in Him, you can retrieve those truths right at the moment you feel that offense rising up.  Stop, drop, and roll.  Yep, it works here too.  Stop those thoughts, drop to your knees (surrender to God), and roll in the truth of how much God loves you and how full of His love you are, and let those truths consume your heart.  Quickly your emotions will be at peace and whatever you say will put out the fire, rather than stir up.    One of the best books I have read on offense is The Bait of Satan, by John Bevere, Check it out. Literally, from the library.  J


Second step to loving and unified relationships is finding a common cause. We see several examples In the Word of God of the power of unity in purpose. In the book of John, Jesus prays to the Father that the body of Christ would be one with each other, and with Him even as Jesus is one with God.  Why? So that we can reveal God to this earth.   Which means we will not complete our mission without love and unity, in our families and body of Christ.  We see at the Tower of Babel, God Himself said, because they had unified in purpose that nothing they put their hearts to do would fail. Wow!!! That is powerful!!  Unity works for good and bad. Therefore the enemy uses it as well.  If you and your husband are in agreement daily that you will continue to accept the strife in your home, guess what?  Nothing strife wants to do will be impossible.  Kick it out now, and agree with God!  Agree with love, and nothing Love wants to do in your family will be impossible. In the book of Nehemiah, we see another story of what unity can accomplish.  Actually it is a good story for all three of these points.  We see repentance of offenses, we see favor come to him, then a common cause, and honor that he continues to give.   You too can rebuild the walls of your family, your church, or even of the larger body of Christ, even as Nehemiah rebuilt the walls of Jerusalem.


The third step is honor.  You will only become consistently unoffendable, if you on purpose become the one who brings honor to each situation.  Honor is an outpouring of love and humility in your own heart.  Ugh, did I say humility?  Yes, humility is a stronghold for our Christlikeness.  Everything that we are, we are in Christ.  We are presented holy and blameless in Him, we are the righteousness of God in Christ, we are seated in heavenly places in Christ.  We are only fallible human beings, apart from Christ.  The greatest step of humility we can take is to come to God each day, to His Word, to worship Him, and lay ourselves before Him to honor, praise and allow Him to do what He wants in us.  When you do this, it creates greater humility in you towards others. Because you know where your strength comes from, and without Him you would be a much different person.  Stop coming to God praising yourself, wanting yourself built up.  Come to Him to worship Him, and your flesh will die and your spirit will be built up. Then when something comes to your mind that is negative about someone else, choose on purpose to think and speak a positive thing about them, behind their back and in front of them.  Sometimes we think if we praise someone who is screwing up, then we are enabling them to keep screwing up. Those of us who have experienced that, have a real issue with control. Yep, we think we are somehow in control of this person’s destiny.  Let them go,  to God, and start doing what God does towards them, and you will really affect their destiny. Let your love be revealed to them, and honor them.  Love never fails, but control, manipulation, fear, and criticism always fails.  If you walk a life of honor, then God may at times have you speak something to someone, in love.  Do you know how to know if that is what Is happening?  A good way to tell if God is really telling you to do that, is to check your heart.  Is it gushing with compassion for that person?  Are you hurting for the place they are in? Is that really your first thought, or the one you bring up to excuse your judgment?  Take that issue to God, saying “God do you see what they are doing?”  I remember something God told an author Francis Frangipaine.   “Yes, Francis I see that, and I gave my life for them.  Now go do the same”.  That is honor at it’s best.


I have an excitement that those  who set themselves on this track, will be tremendous ambassadors for Christ, revealing God’s great love to those around them and shifting the attitude, moods, and atmospheres around them.  This is when the Kingdom of God will spread to every nook and cranny of this earth, and we will see even greater works of God on this earth.              by Lisa Winchell